Changing

i started this blog to document how O/our relationship changes over time. Since then i have learnt that this is much harder to do than i anticipated.

It's not that W/we're not changing, more that the overall change is happening too slow for me to notice. Or else my emotions and feelings change so often that it would be futile to try to recall and write each of them down; it would be like trying to remember and tell every thought you had in a day.

What i have noticed is that my general attitude has changed. i am still the same person but now i'm much more relaxed about being submissive. i still think about what it means to be in a D/s relationship but not nearly as often as i once did. i believe that this is because i am more accepting to it. Not that i didn't want it before, but now i don't (often) want to dictate the relationship. i had an idea of what W/we should be like in my head and when it wasn't like that in real life i got confused or tried to manipulate U/us into my image of U/us. i don't try to do that now.

i've learnt that while W/we might not be how i imagined, W/we are better because W/we instinctively seem to know (usually) what each other needs. So i am now at peace with U/us progressing naturally. i am still just as excited to find out how O/our journey will unravel but now i am more concerned with living the journey rather than measuring the change.